Stuuupid Dating
by MinaPotterUesugi
Summary: Strangest Pairings for X1999...If you're not afraid of having your brain severelly damaged, read this...


**Hiya there, I'm Mina Potsugi! Welcome to my insane mind!**

**Disclaimer:** I don't even own this computer, so guess what...

Me No Own Nothing

Me Own this fic... great deal, huh?

This was an original idea of Aikawa Fuuko and begs Pleeease don't kill me for destroying the original idea... I took the game idea and transformed but if you're Aizawa Fuuko you'll know that this is not at all a copy... Actually I asked for her permission sticks tongue out

**FYI:** This game is easy to play, first you write in pieces of paper the names of both man and woman and the what they'll say and where... I'm doing it my way cuz I invented the finale thingys. Buuuuut as Clamp is obsessed with having weird cough cough friendships and couples I mixed all the papers... there's no difference anyway! (Uke, Seme, Boy, Girl, Boyish Girl, Nataku, Girlish Boy... and so on)

The characters might be a LITTLE OoC but that's how the cookie crumbles...

(BIG prize if you know where did that quote come from ... clue... a movie...)

**Place:** Church

**Says:** Aoki "You're so KAWAI!"

**Answers:** Subaru "Undress!"

**Mina's Reaction:** O.O Subby! Who taught you that?

**Finale:** Aoki passes out and the Sakurazuka appears from the shadows saying "I see that my little Subaru-kun is getting more bold..."

And Subaru passes from the surprise and like a little kid caught doing something bad he goes into one of his classics ANGSTy moments whining about everything... "Oh... why me? snif snif"

Not even the Assassin of the Sakura Threes can stand this so... he approaches Subaru "Take this, angst Prince" Subaru reacts at the last moment and attacks Sei sending his away and through the doors. The sound of a giggle is heard all across the acoustic room so characteristic of a church, as we realize that Subby is the one giggling we are able to see a tissue throw carelessly to the floor by the onmyouji in his way out...

**Place:** Pet Shop

**Says:** Kyougo "You're hot"

**Answers:** Saya "My wish is to die with my loved one"

**X Fan's Reaction:** Aww... they are such a good couple... and their kids are really gorgeous! .

**Finale:** Saya sweat drops and hits Kyougo on the head saying "With my loved one, you baka!"

Kyougo sits down trying to figure out what in the seven hells just happened as we see Saya running and singing _"Tooru, I'm coming honey"_

insert large sweatdrop on reader's heads

**Place:** Clouds (don't ask me why!)

**Says:** Kamui "Daddy!"

**Answers:** Tooru "Huh?"

**Reaction:** . Huh?

**Finale:** Kamui gets furious cause his mother is always avoiding telling him who is his father... he says "That's enough!" and kicks her... we hear Tooru scream "I'll never tell..." Splash "Anybody of you" and she's dead...

Meanwhile, Kamui is being harassed by the Dark Kamui... how uncommon!

Dark Kamui says in a seductive voice "Did you call me?"

"What?" said Kamui afraid and knowing what was coming...

"You sounded desperated to get your Daddy," raises eyebrow "Right?"

"Hey," hidden behind a red piece of fabric was Nataku "You said that to me too!"

cue for the nervous laugh of the Dragon of Heaven's Kamui

**Place: ** Jail

**Says:** Kakyo expressed "I feel like putting a pink dress!"

**Answers:** Kotori "I'll eat you up" 

**Mina's Reaction:** See... I told you they are all weird...

points at Kakyo or is it Kakyo-hime now?

**Finale:** Kakyo has a pink dress imagine the most girly thing ever and add ribbons and flowers while he thinks that Hokuto would be proud of this dress...

Kotori's laughing and says "You're destiny has been we see the other occupants of the small prisson cell with ... ehem... not very decent looks on their faces foreordained ha ha ha ha"

In heaven... Hokuto yells "You baka, this is not a be-the-most-uke-as-possible moment"

**Place: ** Clamp School (Or Mina School, suit yourself)

**Says:** Sorata in his always excited voice "Kill everybody! MUAHAHAHA"

**Answers:** A fuming Fuuma (HUH, that doesn't sound right!) "Shut up"

Nataku's Reaction: "Don't you dare do anything to my daddy" pouts or at least tries to 

**Finale:** "Oi," claimed the Dark Kamui, "You should read the script every since in a while, right Sorata?"

"Uh-uh, Fuuma... but" whatever sound the shinken does as the shinken passed through Sorata's body the formerly called Fuuma shouted "No buts, prat" then covering his face appeared a slight blush as he thought to himself "except for Kamui's but, oops, butt" as he giggled for his own wit, the real Kamui landed 'accidentally' on top of him... sending him to la la Land... (That means he's knocked out for the few of you who don't know)

And then...

That's 'til the next chapter... please R&R so I can improve this... and the latter chaps too

Bye blows kiss to everybody who survived without serious brain damage after reading this

Mina Potsugi 


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